8:15 p.m. - 2007-12-21
Pantomime
Well, that�s me done until after Christmas; I don�t go back to work until the 27th December, though that�s not to say I�m a free agent. Twinkles still has tomorrow, Sunday and Christmas Eve to work, shop workers, as he says in his own inimitable fashion, are no more than frigging slaves to commerce at this time of year and chained to the wrong side of the till. Actually, he�s quite excited and looking forward to the next few days, as some of you may remember its become a kind of custom in the jewellers for Twinks to turn up to work on Christmas Eve dressed in full drag in aid of a Charity. This year Twinks (desperate for some Showtime) thought it might be a good idea to make a real event of the pre-Christmas weekend and after discussions with his boss, Don, and the owner of the jewellers he was given the go-ahead. Not only will the �show� draw in customers to the shop it will also raise funds for the chosen charity, which this year is to be the specialist baby unit at our local hospital, a gesture of remembrance for my baby brother Thomas who died after being born very prematurely. Gill and my dad were extremely touched by the gesture and will be taking part in the proceedings. The theme is pantomime and fairytale characters, Twinks has even dressed the shop windows in theatre style complete with red curtains, they look wonderful. All the shop staff are dressing up, even Pat, and so will I be, I�m dressing as Buttons and I�m offering my services as a gift wrapper, customers can make a donation to have their purchases festively gift wrapped, I�m going to have my own little corner of shop counter and will be curling ribbons like a pro. There�s going to be a couple of stalls set up outside the shop selling home made cakes, biscuits and beverages. Mum and Prissy will be taking a turn at helping out along with other kind-hearted volunteers. I will admit that I had my reservations about the whole thing at first (Twinks to Tarn: oh give your frigging piles a treat and relax your sphincter for once, its for Charity) but now I�m really looking forward to it and it should be a lot of fun. Twinkles is not dressing as Cinderella to match my Buttons, playing Cinders is not to his taste at all, too frumpy darling, she only gets one decent frock in the whole show and that only at the end. Nope, no rags for my precious, he�s going as the fairy Godmother, a very glamorous one complete with sparkling wings and yards of tulle. Big Mary has promised to don his infamous Christmas tree frock and help dole out mince pies and terrible jokes in his capacity as the Panto Dame and Cherie Pie and a couple of her chorus girls are going to sing Christmas songs to accompany the shaking of their collection tins. Lulu, Snow White (as pure as the driven sludge) insisted on baking some fairy cakes to contribute to the stalls even though Twinks tried to discourage him. Lu is as stubborn as a mule when he gets set on something and refused to be discouraged but he did bow to the suggestion that he should stick to something conventional. The conventional he chose was chocolate, great, wonderful, however Lu, like Twinks, can never be totally conventional about anything and somehow a pinch of chilli powder found itself into the mix, as Lu thought chocolate chilli cake had a chic ring to it and was bound to taste nice, actually, the combo just about worked and they wouldn�t have been half bad if he�d resisted the temptation to decorate them with five spice flavoured icing, it was just too, too disgusting.
Well, my own delicate little fairy queen is stridently hailing me, our taxi is due and thus I must shift my arse before he pulls my plug and forcibly disconnects me. Honestly, I�m bullied I am.
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